COUNSELLING
What stages does it entail?
If you are deciding whether you would like to start a counselling process with us, you may have questions about it such as: what exactly can I expect from counselling? what does a typical counselling session look like? how many counselling sessions do I need? or, can counselling do things such as helping my friend and I reflect on, or repair, our friendship?
Below we put together a short summary of the stages of the process of counselling and what you can expect in each of them. We hope this summary helps you understand the structure of what we are doing and, also, gives you a horizon in terms of how many resources a client should typically invest for counselling to be the most useful.
If you are wondering whether counselling would be a suitable tool to address your current situation, you can also take a look at our article on what counselling can do for you, or you can book a free consultation with us and we can talk about it. Wonder what would happen in that consultation? You can read about it below.
FREE CONSULTATION
In the free consultation we will meet for the first time. You will get to know how we work and we will get to know what you hoped counselling will do for you. We will ask questions about your situation and your goals in order to better understand what we could do for you. You will have space to ask us whatever questions you may have. At the end of the consultation we will let you know whether we would recommend moving on to the next stage: the assessment stage. After the consultation, you can take your time to decide whether you want to start counselling with us. If you do, you can book your first assessment appointment.
ASSESSMENT SESSIONS
This stage usually lasts one or two sessions. In the first assessment session we will go a bit more into detail on the counselling process, goals, risks, confidentiality limits, and your rights as our client, making sure that you understand the process that you are starting and freely agree to participate in it. Once we have settled these bases, we will sign a document in which you officially agree to participate under these conditions. This is the informed consent.
In the first session we will also start exploring the reasons you decided to start counselling and we will work towards setting specific goals for the counselling process. In subsequent assessment stage sessions we will continue to form specific goals and to learn about you and your situation.
WORKING STAGE SESSIONS
The working stage is usually somewhere from 5 to 10 sessions long. This stage has three main components: Exploration, insight and action. During these sessions, there will be moments of exploration, moments of feeling stuck and moments of insight that will usually be followed by moments of action.
Exploration. During exploration you will be given the space to engage, at your own pace, with the situation or problem that you brought to counselling. Your counsellor will be there to support the reflection and to offer a space where you can look at your own functioning in detail and without judging it. Reaching a state where one is truly able to do this is not as easy as it seems and it is what leads to insight.
Feeling stuck. During the sessions there can be moments when it feels like nothing is moving. You might find yourself repeating the same stories, circling around familiar thoughts, or being unsure what’s changing. Feeling stuck can signal that something important is just beneath the surface. It can also signal that one does not feel safe enough yet in the counselling space. Or it can signal other processes happening. A bit of feeling stuck is actually quite common and it should be met with patience. A lot of feeling stuck is not helpful and it should be addressed.
Insight. Insight is achieved when you suddenly see your situation and yourself in a new light, from a new perspective. This can be an initial shock and it can feel initially uncomfortable, although it does not have to. Ultimately insight usually leads to self-growth and to a more adaptative and compassionate stance on your situation, to a feeling that “now I get it, now I know what to do”.
Action. Action usually comes after insight. Seeing things from a new perspective often inspires people to start acting differently and facing the situation they came to explore more efficiently and more in line with who they are. Ultimately, new actions happen in daily life, outside of the counselling sessions. However, within the sessions small exercises can be used as precursors or preparation for action in daily life.
CLOSING STAGE
The closing stage does not span specific “closing sessions”, it is rather a realization that slowly settles in. As the cycles of exploration, insight and action happen, it will start feeling to you and to your counsellor like you have reached a stage where you have taken all you could take from counselling at this point. By this time you will hopefully have reached the goals that were set at the beginning. When this moment arises, you can decide to end the counselling process. Keep in mind that ending a counselling process does not mean that counselling could not be useful to you again in the future.
COUNSELLING IN PAIRS OR GROUPS
A similar working structure can be applied to facilitate exchange and conflict resolution for pairs or groups of people, such as friends, parents and their adult children, siblings or polycules. If you are interested in booking counselling in pairs or groups, please book a consultation with Andrea.